I explored testing the depth of wellness in my relationship in my last blog. I didn’t mention how much my wellness is impacted for better or for worse based on the degree that I’m creating goodness or consuming goodwill. Goodwill can have a such a short shelf life, perhaps a little better than a soufflé. Does anyone actually still cook soufflés anymore?
I also didn’t mention the importance of listening for the style or actions that my partner desires from me. This thought is inspired by the book, The Five Love Languages, by Gary Chapman. Each of us have a different hierarchy of love expressions. Some like words of appreciation, others prefer the gift of quality time. Many appreciate material gifts, while for me, I value the gift of touch. The fifth love language is acts of service.
Knowing your Love Language and sharing it with your partner is great way to foster communication and support. This quick, Love Languages Test is useful for determining your personal Love Language. You might ask your partner to do the test himself or herself, but I found interviewing my partner to be infinitely more bonding.